“Some things are worth fighting for.” – Liane Davey
Conflict is not always a bad thing! Do you struggle creating the kind of productive conflict your team needs to excel?
Today’s guest is Liane Davey, founder of 3COze, psychologist, keynote speaker, and author. She also loves a good old fashioned factory tour – I mean, who doesn’t ? 🙂 Having been to the Fender guitar factory myself in Corona, CA, I can understand her fascination!
Liane’s latest book, The Good Fight, focuses on how to create the kind of conflict teams and organizations need to get along – and get stuff done.
In today’s episode, you’ll learn:
- 3 unique ways to create productive conflict that teams actually embrace
- Why conflict should be viewed as “flossing,” and not a root canal
- The power of ritual and how it creates calm & control
- And much more!
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How to Deal With Wrong Mindsets About Conflict
I think one of the reasons that people aren’t using the new skills that they’re learning is that they’ve been taught that conflict is impolite, unprofessional, not lady-like, etc.
So the first thing I did is changing people’s mindsets about conflict. And to do that, you have to look at what shaped that mindset, and also, make a business case as to why conflict is necessary and important in organizations.
Why Conflict Is Necessary
Conflict is a feature, not a bug, on teams. It’s the purpose of having teams – to present different perspectives and create tension. Otherwise, if one person can do it all by themselves, then they should just go do it themselves.
So to handle conflicts better, we need to identify the different roles on the team and answer some questions. What’s the unique value or superpower of this role? Who are the shareholders of this role?
Simple Steps to Conflict Resolution
Say something that makes the person feel heard or understood, ask a question to let them expose their emotions and values, then speak their truth, and then you are in the right to add your truth and to turn it into a conversation. There’s supposed to be tension but not friction.
Links and Resources
The Good Fight by Liane Davey (book)
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey (book)
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lecioni (book)
Made to Stick: Why Some Ideas Survive and Others Die by Chip Heath & Dan Heath